TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
What a load of bullshit! It was probably something like: Waiter Good evening, may I take your order? Mother: (Places order) Daughter: (Places order) Waiter: I will be right back with your order ladies. Daughter: Actually... Mother: Shut the fuck up before I break your legs you pretentious fucking little twat! Now... Sit. The fuck. Down
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The plus side to this argument is that no man wants to go near a feminist and the reek will be an easy way of identifying them. Plus, it stops them from accidentally breeding because who in their right mind would put their dick into a man hating feminist?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Hello! UberHUMOR. Emphasis on the HUMOR. What the fuck is wrong with people that they have to post a sob story on a web site specifically created to post stuff to make you laugh. You want this sort of thing, start a site called Ubermisery
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Over Christmas just gone I saw an elderly gentleman trying to pass a college student who was blocking the door at our shopping centre. He said "Excuse me son but ma..."
The lad in question turned and said "Did you assume my gender?" and his mates started sniggering. What the old guy said next made me laugh out loud. He said "Actually I assumed you were just ignorant but now I know you are a twat. Now either move or get ready to fight because either way you are not going to stop me until you grow some fucking balls, SON!" Knob head moved out of the way and the old guy smiled and said "Thank you pussy"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Oh for fucks sake! Bollocks to this, just get the police to taser the dumb shits and when they have finished filling there collective underwear with shit and urine and stopped drooling tell them to fuck off home or they will be tasered again
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I got full custody of my daughter based on the fact that her mother walked out on us to fuck a bloke 22 years older than her but instantly regretted it when it turned out he was married. She ended up running off with her sisters fiance who later turned out to be a sexual deviant... so yeah, what a shame she didnt go live woth her mum. NOT
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I find that anyone who uses 'like' as punctuation are the type of people that have an IQ so low they cant spell it and the word like is used as a space filler while they wait for the neuron to fire and deliver an incoherent sentence. I would have kicked her out and called in warning the rest of the drivers that there is an opportunist trying to make money on false allegations
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Im not enjoying this. Where are the tazers, the pepper spray. the beatings? I want to see him zapped until he shits himself then sprayed until he looks like someone with a bee allergy with his face in a hive and battered until he cant sneeze without his jaw dislocating
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Ok, lets put this in easy terms for dumb asses. While the first-class area with its full compliment of services was kept for NASA passengers, its main cabin and insulation were stripped as was the entire seating from other classes and none essential internal structures such as kitchens, elevators, toilets and emergency oxygen reserves, mounting struts were added, and the fuselage was strengthened. Vertical stabilizers were added to the tail to aid stability when the Orbiter was being carried. The avionics and engines were also upgraded, and an escape tunnel system similar to that used on Boeing's first 747 test flights was added. The flight crew escape tunnel system was later removed following the completion of the Approach and Landing Tests (ALT) due to concerns over possible engine ingestion of an escaping crew member. The work reduced the weight of the 747 Shuttle Carrier by 50,000lbs. the engines upgrades added 35,000lbs of thrust but the speed was reduced from mach 0.84 to mach 0.6. Fully loaded the shuttle carrier weighed 710,000lbs where as the 747 commercial weighed 735,000lbs. Conclusion: you are not the only one getting on the plane so bear that the more weight that's added, then the more fuel and the slower the speed of the plane. This means you are the reason for delaying the flight. If this is a problem for you then take the train!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
In fact if we guys think it looks really nice we will hope and also suggest that a woman wear the dress again. If its sexy enough and we get laid we will insist she wears it again
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
This unfuckable nob contaminator has just become a hypocrite. She is arguing that certain students have had their rights denied but she is denying him the right to counter her argument. It would probably be along the lines of "Your expelled for being a giant douche! now get the fuck off this campus you miserable fucker!" Never let your university lose credibility caused by the stupidity of others bringing the academic level down
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
There is only 2 genders and 1 sub class: Male and female. Got a dick? Your male! Can take a dick? Your a female! and the sub class? well thats called pretentious twat and its reserved for people who use the line "Did you assume my gender?" Yes, and I was wrong you pretentious twat
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Fucking hell! I bet the 2 questions that destroyed her case were who the hell managed to fuck her and why the hell they would want to!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
So its Ok for her to suppress the rights of others just to pander to her own ego but its not Ok for everyone else to celebrate an event that has been celebrated a long time before she was even born?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
All the owner of this video needs to do is get a good snap shot of her, turn it into a poster with the message 'Kids, this is the woman who stole the candy from our house and left you all with nothing!' and put the posters up everywhere. Add a link so people can log on and watch it on youtube and then just sit back and enjoy the results
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Wow! I must have a really compact Stanley Assault Rifle! I use mine to tighten and loosen screws. I didn't know I could shoot it too. This will be fun.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Its because we straight men don't want to fuck a man even if he cut off his knob and tucked in his balls! I bet this was posted by Bruce Jenner
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Had this happen to me once. We all got out of the car, locked it up and walked away. The look of WTF! on the wankers face was priceless
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
When you remove all the excuses such as race, sex, religion etc the responsibility rests entirely on the person. You can't put the blame on anyone or anything else if you're without empathy and morals. We are all responsible for our actions and no one else is to blame. It takes less than a second to think "Would I like it if someone did that to me?" and a mere few seconds to think "What if that was me?"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
And yet you are still not satisfied with what you have been offered? You're the sort that I would definitely turn down you unappreciative bitch
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
And then one day, the White House is taken over by terrorists and the president is taken hostage and there is only one man that can save the day...
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Cant stand a fat ass on a woman but I'm very partial to a nicely shaped one but it amounts to nothing if she is a shallow and mean bitch then she can take a hike
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I read the full story about this and loved how the judge made sure it was clear that it had no bearing on the flag but based entirely on a racist attack on an 8 year old childs birthday party and that they had threatened to shoot the kids with a shotgun and make the others watch. Loved the fact they cried when they got sent down
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Until you take in a homeless person and wake up the following morning blinking into the bright light in a police interview room covered in blood and being asked "Where are your wife and kids?"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
These are the people who make the most sense but no African American listens to. If they did then they would probably realise how hypocritical there own actions are. All lives matter or no lives matter, don't be a dick about it and make it about yourself
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Actually, she is the descendant of a people who were oppressed not her so the holocaust argument is not holding water anymore. Oh, and how did that work out in the end? Whats that? The Allied Forces saved your grandparents? Your welcome now quit bitching!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Until you can change the DNA of a person where the XY Chromosomes are changed to XX Bruce Jenner will still look like a bloke in drag whose resting face is the same as a chimpanzee's
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
There are 2 genders on this planet. Male and Female. Anything else is a sexual preference or basically how and what you would like to fuck. For example, I used to think a pansexual was someone who really got horny in the kitchen especially near the cooker but it turns out I didnt give a fuck!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I saw something similar to this quite some time ago but it was an attractive woman and a line of 6 men and what she did was whisper to each man along the line "Im going to have sex with you after we are done here" and then said to the last man "I told them I was going to have sex with each one of them when we are done... I didnt tell them Im a man" He cracked up and, working back down the line, she told the others that she was a man. When she got to the first man in the line she looked at him and said loudly "Wanna see my dick?" Whole thing took 25-30 seconds and everyone in the line also including the filming crew cracked up. I cant seemt o find it anywhere online but it was an old video
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
There's so many of these now that its no longer funny. Its just posed crap by people who do not have the brains to do anything original. If you want to take it up a notch then have a full on gay snog with one of the arseholes carrying the signs
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Wow! 1 minute in and its so shit that you can tell no one wanted to be there! Eric Andre looked like that annoying idiot from school who will try anything and do anything to be liked but still gets ignored
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Ive solved this problem a long time ago by not wasting time with these kinds of sites on the basis that if they are hiding the price then they are overcharging and know about it hence the embarrassed price concealment
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I saw the news about this and to be honest if you're going to use the public murder of a black guy by a cop as an excuse to rob people then you deserve to get shot
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
And that's how you end a career before it has begun. Bye bye tosser. May Kobe drop the biggest karma shaped turd from heaven upon you
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Ive seen the anti-vaxxer version, It has now slots, the 'patient' is a 5 year old kid and the box is designed to look like a coffin
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Being kind does not work. I spent most of the night making bacon sandwiches to give to the local religious group. Boy were they pissed! They chased me right out of that mosque!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
News flash buddy! When we say news flash buddy its to correct someone who has made an assumption and got it so very wrong that everyone groans quietly from the pain of your stupidity
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Probably on his way home and picked up a single red rose for his wife thus proving that the romance in their relationship is still alive and she obviously loves those little loving gestures so yes, a man of value and that value is priceless
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
That looks like its a digital video camera and from the angle it is positioned I would say call the police as its taking 'Up skirt videos and photos'
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
So, everyone, do your part and throw more bags into the sea. This way the turtles have plenty to eat and wont have to get stung by accidentally nipping at a jellyfish
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I'm surprised he didn't get his arse kicked! Fuck him and the rest of the hoarders! I hope their shit has dropped them into a pit of debt. At least they have plenty of tissue to wipe away the tears
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Witnessed, not involved: I was in a cafe, best described as a greasy spoon, when, while waiting in the queue to buy a coffee, I heard " I want to speak to the manager!" The server called into the kitchen "Hey Frank, angry customer wants to see the manager!" and who I presume to be Frank shouted back "Tell 'em to fuck off!"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
They were not suicides. People crossing the bridge were so distracted by everything on the bridge that they didn't look where they were going and fell off
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Awww bless, a gullible twat. I haven't seen one of these for a long time. They are a dying breed you know. Its the lack of willing sexual partners that does it.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Here in the UK: Cant afford to clean your teeth? Why not, toothpaste and toothbrushes are cheap but here's a list of free dentists you can choose from. Cant pay for a new mattress? Well, here's a low interest social loan where you can pay back £5 a week out of your unemployment benefit but if you cant claim benefits then here's a free doctor, physiotherapist and chiropractor. What about that lump? Oh dear, its cancer. Put your wallet away we have got you covered. Just concentrate on your treatment and hopefully your recovery.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Go to the bathroom and get some toilet paper. Get the wad and make it wt and rub soap on it and then fold it so it has rounded edges and corner. Sit by the feet and draw the wad up from the heel to the toes of one foot then count to 2 when the foot pulls back quickly and then look at the owner of the feet through the middle of the seats, look that prick dead in the eyes and then wipe your chin and mouth on your sleeve
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Translation: Found a broken laptop in some ones bin and took it home for parts but took the opportunity to pretend I gave it a death wank
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The lesson I learned was: If you don't tell someone about a problem you have then they are more likely to roast you for it rather than help you out. Don't blame someone for keeping your mouth shut
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
First of all, wheres the water supply? Theres no turrets and no Brahmin feed trough. Add to that theres no food growing in the front yard and theres no scavenging station not to mention how easy it is for raiders, feral ghouls and super mutants to attack and kidnap family members. I hope you got a X-01 stashed in there because your going to need it!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I see your research was thorough and that you put a lot of time and effort into it. Shame you have nothing to show for your endeavors
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Less than 24 hours after 120 people are massacred in Paris, France and the US throw 9/11 at the world again. Dont get me wrong, I have nothing bad to say about those who were victims of the attack but its not the first terror attack and it wont be the last. Its like someone having great news and that one irritating person who did one thing right in their whole lives jumping up and down waving saying "What about what I did!" Stop trying to diminish what the victims of terrorist attacks are suffering. Its been long enough. You dont here us going on about Lockerbie (270 Dead) or the 2012 Peshwar School attack (140+ Dead 132 were children) So stop with the "Oh, your family watched your sons head cut off but extremists? Well, we had 9/11" crap and spare the time to think of others
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Hit him and then tell him if he cant look after what he has got then there is no way in hell you will buy him another expensive phone if thats what 5 months of use looks like. Then work his ass off with grotty nasty chores until he appreciates you better
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
You will find that if you sentence false accusers to twice the time served by the wrongly convicted, the amount of false accusations will fall
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I think that all emergency vehicles should be fitted with some kind of snow plough arrangement on the front to push moronic drivers and their cars out of the way in an emergency
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Always, always, ALWAYS fuck with phone scammers. Please post your best Scammer Pay Back in the comments so we can have a laugh. Best one I did was to put on an indian accent and repeat everything back to the scammer word for word including the inflictions. I'm sure i learned to say some swears in indian but not sure which ones
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
No humour involved. No swearing or other obscenity. This is an advertisement for his show The F Word. Uberhumor is plummeting to new lows that were never known to exist
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
She should be sentenced to 15 years in a mens prison in the violent sex offenders wing so she can feel what rape and assault REALLY feels like
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
You would be forgiven for not realising that this isn't a hostage situation but in fact some one holding an entitled parent with her crotch goblin in place for execution
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I tip well on a good day (around 25%) and I double tip if its freezing cold, pissing down with rain or there is a god deal of snow on the roads. Anyone willing to deliver in harsh conditions should be thanked properly for putting up with that shit and battling through it all
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The people who lived there before him had curtains over the glass parts of the door for privacy so put the peephole in so they can see who is at the door when the curtains are closed
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I have a friend who is bipolar. Its just one of those things. She has and always has had a good life but she swings into suicidal depression.
I am happy to say that she hasn't tried eating a tree to make her feel better but she does love a good barbecue
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
She is 74 now and still refuses to have cosmetic surgery of any kind. I have to say she has aged gracefully https://www.usmagazine.com/stylish/news/sophia-loren-refused-to-get-nose-job-plastic-surgery-2014611/
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
He is buying her a gift. Its a 21 year old blond Swedish au pair. to help around the house, you know, so that she can go shopping while the au pair sorts out things at home
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I would never go into politics. Long hours, massive responsibilities, accountable for all decisions and no appreciation for the job.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Wrong header. Dream vs Reality is what you want and what you get. This is What you had and what time has done to it. More of a Then and Now
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I agree. Bruce is now a plastic grotesque man trying to pass himself off as a woman but can only come across as a cross dressing eunuch. I mean be honest, who the hell would fuck that? Really, Who? His chin looks like the plastic has bubbled because it to close to an open flame! I bet you would all rather fuck the puppet rather than fuck the muppet!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Overheard whilst shopping: "I love how these protesters shout about paying the wages of the police with their taxes, makes me laugh!" "Whys that then?" "Well, the aint exactly earning any fucking money while they are on the street screaming at the cops! Besides, their taxes also pay for prisons. Maybe they would like a bit of a refund in Her Majestys Hotel chain"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Did you know that Carrie Fisher has said she does not care what people think, its called aging and those who comment on it are the biggest, saddest bunch of pricks in the world.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I wish she would step in with our government. With Cameron handing over the deeds to the country to everyone who knocks on the border, spending money on people who would happily blow us of the globe and then laughing as the disabled queue up at the cemetery gates Im surprised he has the time to face fuck a dead pig. Now tell me, which of your presidents can match a twat like that?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
That sucks. Someone you love dying on the other side of a piece of glass and there is nothing you can do to help and you can't even hold their hand and comfort them. This is happening a lot in the world but each case hurts just as much so why lower the tone of it by posting it on a humour site?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I hate how rioters will jump on any excuse to rob a place. Hey! A cop killed a black guy... Let's rob this shop and steal and smash everything even though she has no connection to the killing at all!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Aha! So that's where she is from! I asked a cute girl out last night and she declined saying she is a Lesboan. I'm not chasing her to Macau though
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
#12 Mum: I want to be an anti-vaxxer Dad: I want to be a flat earther Daughter: I want to be a conspiracy theorist Son: I want to run a 7-11
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
OK, I don't have the Palmaris Longus muscle so I'm a part of the 14% that has evolved to the point that we are so bored we will do the test for the Palmaris Longus muscle while still being average enough to try the test with their hand palm down before trying palm up. The Goosebumps thing, I can do that on purpose. It's called arguing with the wife. It also triggers the automatic response that causes you to shit yourself too so it is not recommended
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
"Today, we celebrate the {E-eeeeeeee] the brave service of {E-eeeeeeee] of Frida and are proud {E-eeeeeeee] proud to annonce her retire- {E-eeeeeeee] -retirement after 10 years fo rescuing {E-eeeeeeee] rescuing more then 50 people from {E-eeeeeeee] God dammit Frida! [E-eeeeeeee E-eeeeeeee E-eeeeeeee E-eeeeeeee E-eeeeeeee ]
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
And why not! That dog puts its life on the line just like them every day so it's to be expected that they love a respect their K9 buddy
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
At least they were graceful when they were made to look like fools and took it on the chin. Normally they would have just open fired
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Wait! Wait! Let me just check my sympathy... nope. Not a single fucking drop... Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
These things are a rip off! Why would you spend on 10 cups of coffee that would buy a jar of coffee, milk and sugar and would make a hell of a lot more?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The only time I call a person 'They' is when that person has multiple personalities. Then I try to convince the current personality that one of the others, not sure which one, is plotting to kill them by setting elaborate traps
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
George De Mestral gave the name Velcro, a blend of the French words velours ("velvety fabric") and crochet ("hook") to his invention as well as his company so the company Velcro can shut the fuck up and study their own companies history before whinging about what the name of Velcro's velcro is
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Got my fiancee to tell me what mansplaining was. It felt good to say "You have basically mansplained mansplaing to a man" Im typing this on my laptop from behind the coats in the cupboard by the door
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
"Seriously ***?? 'Its more important to focus on their pleasure'? And you call yourself a feminist?" This line alone explains why feminists are always so angry
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The picture looks like he has an embarrassing younger brother who thinks he is 'down with the kids yo' when is really 38 and a twat where as his current self looks like the disappointed big brother who has given up trying to make excuses for him and just wants him to go away
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Fat may not be a bad word but if you lost a feww hundred pounds you could be called fat. Instead, in your case, fat is part of your dietry requirements
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
My missus upgraded to 10 when the free upgrade first came out... and has not stopped swearing at how shit it is since and right now she is calling it a fucked up piece of shit programmed by a retard whose contribution to artificial intelligence is real stupidity. She wont upgrade back to windows 7 because when I did it I ended having to flatten my PC and do a fresh installation offline. I lost everything. So Windows 10? 2 thumbs up... the programmers ass and then spread apart until he is torn up the entirety of his spine
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I find the way to sound smarter is to know what your talking about. This video is a great example of how avoiding the use of filler words and using slow speech as well as pauses can make you sound autistic
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
As the old man lay on his death bed, he called over his wife "Come close my dear... do you remember the day we got married and the wedding vows we took 50 years ago?" She gently took his hand and said "I do indeed my love". "Do you remember The Promise?" He said looking deep into her tear filled eyes. She took a deep shuddering breath and closed her eyes "Yes. You promised that you would never leave me all alone" a fond smile spread across her face. Taking her by her shoulders he said "I will never let you live alone"... and pushed her off the roof
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Actually Viagra was originally developed for cardiovascular diseases. It turned out it was crap because of all the side effects including the fact it caused erections. Limp Dick is not gods will, its the result of realising your talking to a feminist
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Me and the missus have gone pass the 'who can fart loudest' stage and are currently playing the duration game, smell my wrath and name that tune
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
My other half tried the 'We need to talk' line with me once. Only once. I turned to her and said "Over the years, women have fought for equal rights, for independence and their right to be heard. Why do you all say you can do the things we men can do but refuse to do them yourselves? Are you that incapable of proving what you claim that you will lie to everyone as well as yourselves that women can do the same things men can do?" I have to admit, those gutters look immaculate now
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Personally, I wouldn't have one of those prosthetic legs with that ugly oh so realistic excuse of a foot. No. What I would get is a sort of fusion of the terminators and robocops leg. It would look awesome! Something like this http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/ad/e0/20/ade02058310aac9309c062e727673091.jpg
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Little Red Riding Hood packed her basket with goodies and treats and set off through the woods to grandmas house. The Big Bad Wolf stepped out from behind a tree and said "Hello little gi..." He did not finish as Red pulled out an AA12 Automatic Shotgun loaded with explosive shells and fired at point blank taking that fuckers head clean off. Little Red Riding hood chambered another round and blew the slowly coiling smoke out of the barrel before licking the length, giggling as the dampness of her tongue crackled on the heat of the barrel. She carried on her trip to grandmas house and lived happily ever after. The End
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
No need to ask him. I dont do threesomes and besides, can you imagine the creepy feeling you would get when your balls deep and you feel beard on the sack
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Filled with graphics so ugly and with no actual thought that it hurts and offends the eye to the point that I wouldn't read it. Also way to long to bother with.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Its due to be turned on in a few weeks time. Get ready for the obligatory 'Its the end of the world' predictions. Me, Im hoping if it explodes, we all become Meta-humans!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
This is going to replace pole dancing. Then we can see naked chicks flapping about like a beagle with its head stuck out of a car window
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Saw this on the news. Two women saved that girl. They got a good clear picture of the cunt and I hope they find his mangled body in a gutter. So glad they saved that poor girl!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Wait until he realizes how long it took him to load it for just a few seconds of fun and that he has to pick the bands up and reload them
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
With universal healthcare the government will try to keep costs down and any company that produces medical equipment and medications will then be under extreme scrutiny and only the cheapest without compromising quality will be chosen. Politicians in America won't do it because these companies give them big kick backs to stop universal healthcare and run unchecked allowing them to price gouge the people when they are sick or injured. As for insurance, it should be a luxury not a necessity. Universal healthcare will drop the cost of insurance companies as they compete for customers rather than force people to go into poverty. Who will pay through the nose for preferential treatment when healthcare is available for all. There will be no tax increase as they can easily take the excess out of many pointless budgets and move it into healthcare. This will take the power out of the insurers hands and give it back to the people. Expensive does not mean better when it comes to healthcare. It means expensive and makes no difference to the quality of healthcare. Insurance just lets you queue-jump if its feasible and give you a private room if one is available. Stand up for yourselves! Stop being ripped off! Right now is the time you can least afford it!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I used to have one of these. You always had to make sure the fabric was set perfectly. Too short and the roll ups were tighter than a nuns pussy. Too long and the roll up was looser than my ex's morals
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
A friend of mine went bald at 19. I asked him what the hell happened and he said "I'm not bald, it's a solar panel for a sex machine!"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The Corona Virus seems to be exposing a lot of ingrained scams. I wonder how many places will no longer open due to people realising they have been ripped off. Prove me wrong. Have a wank and see if you get hit by lightning
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I'll take him! Can I have the address of his previous owner so that I can say thank you for such an awesome dog which will involve a lot of shouting as it's difficult to be heard over the screams of agony of some one who's kneecaps have been shattered with a baseball bat.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Get over it tubby. Men are not interested in superficial bitches either so take what's offered and be grateful or go on a diet. That way you can go from fat and unloved to thin and unloved
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
First of all, I applaud anyone who passes doing all they can to save as many people as they can and the medical staff around the world deserve more than applause. What this post needs is the name of the nurse so they can be remembered and appreciated for their hard work as their are quite a few that have lost their lives working hellish hours for our benefit. They need our support just as much as we need theirs.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Even though this is a serious problem with a severe punishment I can't help but laugh at the idea of a poacher aiming down his sights at a rhino and suddenly hearing the click of a hammer being pulled back and a cold metal tube touching the back of his head. I have a mental image of the look on his face before it explodes. Awesome!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
My phone has a setting that detects when it is face down and automatically goes into do not disturb mode. I use it at night and when I'm talking to someone
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
He carries her in his pocket. They patrol the outback. When there is a crime being committed, he pulls her out and throws her at the criminal... and she always comes back. They are, Bruce and the Boomerang
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
At last! A Ghostbusters sequel that does not involve shit acting, shit script, shit actors and shit graphics fresh from Scooby Doo Monsters Unleashed!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I tried this when I first saw it and it actually works! I got rid of a broken drill and a bent hammer as well as a knackered old VCR
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The day one of them gets the hint when I say "No, please leave!" (Yes I do say please) and actually leaves without creeping my out will be the day I stop treating them like shit and after 30 years of them constantly knocking my door even after going to their cult head quarters to ask them to stop calling at my home, they still call and ask if they can come in and help around my house. Total strangers! No thank you! Add to that the occasions where they do crazy shit like screeching to a halt in the middle of the road so that one of them can leap out of the passenger side window shouting "DO YOU WANT TO COME TO OUR CHURCH!?!?" No, fuck 'em the weird bastards!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Now if everyone was to tell her that the sound of her voice sounds like a wet and dry vacuum sucking lard through a blender she might just quit
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
We are an ancient race of people with a lot more weird laws such as all taxis are supposed to carry a bale of hay. No riding a cow when you are drunk. A pregnant woman can take a piss anywhere even in a policemans hat. It's illegal to roll or carry any cask, tub, hoop, or wheel, or any ladder, plank, pole, showboard, or placard, upon any footway, except for the purpose of loading or unloading any cart or carriage, or of crossing the footway.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
If he was that good then he would be the one giving the speech instead of embarrassing that poor girl. Hw probably would have got a round of applause too
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
No its not. The left hand side of the picture does not line up. And just for Ute: One side is not straight no matter how hard its forced to fit in
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I thought it was some weird religious cult thing at first. Then I realised what they were doing and thought "Yep, Its a weird religious cult thing"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The hijab was only made cumposlary since 1979. In 1936, Reza Shah decreed a ban on all veils and police had the right to remove them if a woman was wearing one. After he abdicated the laws were relaxed. The problem was that if you tried going into public places wearing one you got kicked out. In 1979 Ayatollah Khomeini decreed that women should observe Islamic dress code... even though it is not ordered in the quran.
Its was in fact brought about to control the masses. Iranian women dressed as western folks did until religion took over the government and the men began to feel emasculated by the wave of women's rights sweeping the globe.
All they have to do is introduce true democracy and the nightmare will be over as soon as they get the Quran waving morons out of power.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I would start that line with "As half of you are new then welcome to the wedding and for those who were here for the married rehearsal, welcome back to the wedding: the reboot"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Reminds me of the time I saw an old lady at a cash machine struggling to put her card in. I asked her if she was ok and if she needed help and she looked up at me and smiled and said "Thank you sweety. Would you mind helping me? I would like to check my balance" So I pushed her over
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Even retailers dont buy more than 200 at a time and then they keep it topped up until they see a drop in sales then they stop buying them. Hopefully this moron will have learnt his lesson
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I dont know whats worse, not talking to your wife for 23 years or watching a 16 minute video on something boring. Luckily Ive done neither
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Picture the scene. Two old ladies sipping their tea, guns on the table and one says "Oooh that Doris, she has a sharp tongue on her. I had to pull her up about it Mary. I did. I tapped her gently on the back of her hand to reassure her I am her friend and said 'If you keep that fuckin' shit up I will blow you skank ass tits off bitch'" The other looks shocked and gasps. Under her breath she leans forward, tea cup and saucer in her hands, and whisper consiprationally "What did she say to that?" Leaning back the first woman says "Not much but she has stopped being so harsh a judge to others" the second old lady nods sagely, sips her tea, licks her lips and looks demurely into the cup "Fuck yeah" She whispers
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Now, look in a mirror. See that? That's not PornHub, that's an ass. That's you. Don't believe anything you say as it reveals you ignorance
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Lets look at this from the sons point of view: I get up in the morning and steal money for weed out of my moms purse. As soon as mom goes out I go to see Tyler and buy some weed. I race home hoping to get there before my mom does but she gets home before me. Mom confiscates my weed as soon as I get in, how does she know? Is she part bloodhound? I sulk for the rest of the day and try again tomorrow...
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Her: How many crimes have you covered up today? Him: One. *Takes out remote detonator and presses button. a Scientology compound explodes* Wanna try for 2?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
If mt mayhs teacher came in looking like that i would ask her what she was doing in my house and why she is still trying to teach me math 30 years after leaving school
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
You're using the wrong type of water. It has to be still crystal clear spring water stored at a nice cool temperature of around -10c
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Ive seen Japan Kuratas. Both of these are so slow that you would get faster action from watching 2 tortoises fuck. And this massive robot sissy fight is only going to be available on subscription channels? Fuck that!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Dear lord, give me the strength not to savage these idiots in there sleep. Grant me the balls that were taken in my youth and bless me with a leg of a willing stranger. Amen
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
During the day it protects him from the sun but during the night... It lies in wait and as soon as he falls asleep it crawls from his head, suction cups making quiet popping noises, leaving little rings on his now pale bald scalp. It scuttles out of the window and prowls the night looking for victims to feed on. A homeless person here, a prostitute there any souls that will help sustain its ever growing volume before sneaking back before the sun rises and, hunger sated, settles back onto his head just before he wakes up
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The bird world version of that weird homeless guy who sits in the town square swearing at pigeons and feeding stale bread to the post box because its a good listener all the time wearing a tinfoil hat
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I love how they are going "Oh no1 look at the harm we are doing to the sea life. Its a good job we are her to cut them open and act all justified about it"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Holy spirit is kinky as fuck. Likes to give AND receive at the same time. Best advice to give: Dance so close she can feel your dick between her thighs or the holy spirit will post the video to brazzers
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Yeah, I think that to make a good impression you should try something original and 'out there' such as making something up for yourself and not copying it from everyone else that uses dating apps
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Ok guys, photo time. Jim, Stand on the left, Bob, sit in front of Jim, Paul next to Jim, Carl sit in front of Paul, Mick, stand by Paul and Frank...Frank? Wheres frank?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Does it change colours too? That would be so cool to watch! Can you imagine the wedding? Vicar: Do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife? Groom: Hmmm? What?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Fuck your like and no I didn't fall for your fake 'find the letter' shit. Why? because I read it all! Now, where's my thirteen billion, nine hundred forty-six million, three hundred twenty-four thousand, five hundred eighty-seven dollars?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Wasn't there something in the bible about the dead rising from their graves and walking the earth? Bet they didn't expect to go paddling
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
He stands atop the snowy slope. A gentle breeze ruffles his ears as he squints down the slope. Tenderly he touches his feet for luck before clicking his feet into each ski. He closes his eyes and lowers his head, a stern but solemn look on his face. His nose twitches in the cold and he exhales slowly. Lowering his goggles over his eyes he stares meaningfully down the slope and puts the ear buds of his ipod in his ears and presses play. As the crackle of imitation vinyl fills his ears he takes his sticks and readies himself. The music blasts into his ears as he lunges forward and the phenomenal burst of speed increases as he accelerates.As he hits the slope as the musical introduction moves to the main crashing and awesome sound of Ride of the Valkyries. In mid flight the operatic voices of the Valkyries ring forth and a tear appears in his eye and he catches the flash of a camera out of the corner of his left eye and his chest expands as his heart fills with pride. This was a good day that will live on forever!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Pretty much how I would like to go. So pissed out of my mind that my last words would be: I...I...I f-f-f-fucking love y-y-bleeerch you, sorry bit loud that one innit, Yeah, your me best mate!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Dink dink dink dink "What are you doing?" Dink dink "Making a complaint" Dink "Why dont you use the Papyrus Complaint?" Dink dink "Tablets are easier to carry and when it comes to complaints...well, Papyrus doest break windows like a widows tablet"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
These are the same people who click on the likes to give water to Africa, type Amen to save the life of a child that either died 5 years ago or is a fully grown adult and seriously believe 1 like=$1. To be honest I feel like this is one massive joke on Trump and on election day his facebook page will feature the sound of a desert wind and a tumble weed will roll across the screen and there will 1 vote in his box and it will be his
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Im sort of expecting to hear Waaa Waaa Waaaaaaaaaaaaaa and then see its beak fall off just before an anvil from ACME lands on its head
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Did he survive? He is a hero if he took an airstrike to wipe out an army of Daesh arseholes but if he survived then he can add Badass to it as well
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Please remember to rotate your meerkats every 5 minutes to ensure they are cooked through evenly before serving in pitta bread with chilli sauce and salad
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
5 students look up with their right eyes missing and stare intently with their remaining left eyes and whisper "Dont you fucking dare!"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
What they should have done is taken out all the attempts to remake the old movie and called it something like Ghostbusters 3: The next level and make it look like the original Ghostbusters passed the business down to their kids after a big paranormal accident wiped them out. Instead they basically took a bunch of rejected CGI from the Scooby doo movies and are trying to pass it off as a reboot. The story line is a joke and probably the only time the word Joke and this film will ever appear, the acting is poor, the props are a bad weak version of neon and steam punk and none of the characters are not very interesting. Hell, I could not tell who was supposed to be who!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
What the fuck! This is UberHUMOR not UberHORROR! Get some perspective for fuck sake! As for the little girl, I feel very deeply sorry that she had the misfortune to have such a terrible thing happen when 911 had a bring a retard to work day
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Is this what they have replaced the tinder whores with? Overly long posts? Bring back the girls, at least we could scroll pass them quickly!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
"But mom! They are going to cut off my nuts" "Dont worry son, It will only hurt for a short while. And by the the way...Im your dad"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Vegetarian propoganda video. Bit of a warning to everyone, Too much protein may cause: Weight gain, Intestinal irritation,
Dehydration, Seizures, Nutritional deficienciesand Kidney problems. Then theres the iron. Dizziness, fatigue, headache, weight loss, vomiting, nausea, gray skin and shortness of breath. Consuming too much iron also makes it harder for your body to absorb zinc. Over time, an excess of iron can damage your liver and other organs and cause arthritis and heart problems. Next is Omega 3. This can lead to increased risk of colitis and immunity dysfunction. Excess calcium can lead to kidney failure, kidney stones, blood vessel and soft tissue calcification and calcium in the urine. Not exactly a super food more of a Kryptonite food. Im off to eat a 64oz sirloin steak!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Today, Daesh (ISIS hate being called that) are struggling to hold ground in Syria. Thats because its hard to hold onto something thats being shook apart by a good fucking bombing!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Unless you can read Taiwanese or speak it, dont bother with the video. Basic story is: Dumb Taiwanese commuter thinks he should insult a white guy and Taiwanese girl for being a couple. They have been for 4 years. He follows them up the train when they try to get away from him and he keeps swearing and verbally abusing them. The police are useless and after 3 weeks of nothing happening the couple post their video and within a few hours, dumbass gets caught and charged
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I was supposed to be the victim of bullying at school but it back fired when I hit the bully in the head with a fire extinguisher.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Nice of you to volunteer to do the cooking and washing up. If taking your phone away gets chores done then maybe not having it back will encourage you to make your bed
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Barbed wire on the top of the rails. Should put the little darlings dreams of escape right out of his head and introduce him to the realities that he will be facing when he grows up
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Adblock! Never had an advert from them except for the ones that the creators make themselves. It always seems to be either Raid or some kind of wallet. No revenue for Youtube! I don't think it will be around much longer anyway
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
He has his job to do just like his dad. His job is to spread smiles around the house and make sure everyone is that little bit happier
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Pilot Frixion pens. They are great for job applications and forms as well as greetings cards. Even clears them after a few seconds in a microwave as well as applying heat to them.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
If a guy did this he would be stripped of his medical license, jailed for 15 years and then put on the sex offenders register but hey, she did it and it was just harmless fun as well as a no no so no more playing doctors and nurses for you
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
My Daughter: Oh my god! I hope they are ok! Me: Nope, they dead. My Daughter: What? My Daughter: Fell out at the top of the loop. Landed on the track breaking their spine before being crushed under the wheels of the roller coaster train. My Daughter: Your joking... right? Me: Yeah. My Daughter:*sigh of relief* Me: They would have fallen through the gap between the tracks going into and out of the loop and smashed their head on he concrete floor. My Daughter:Nnnoooooooooooo!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I bought my daughter one of these fuckers. She ended up sealing it in a vacuum pump sealing container and threw it into the back of the cupboard because it would not shut the fuck up! 2 years later we found it and opened the container FUCKER WAS STILL WORKING! The Batteries were still fully charged because it went into a hibernation mode. We decided to give it to the local pre-school as they are always on the look out for interactive toys and this furbastard could be connected to a tablet besides, the kids keep running over our garden. That was about 8 years ago. From what I heard its still going strong and the kids keep hiding it. Seeing this video makes me feel better and I love the bit at the end where something, possibly an eye ball, pop out.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Take a proper look. The cars on the right are on the hard shoulder. If they behave the way they do in the UK you can be guaranteed that there is some dumb fuck on a motorbike lane straddling thinking its a motorcycle lane.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Panel 5: Guy: Would you like a cup of tea? Genie: Please Panel 6: guy opens genies lamps lid and drops in 2 teabags next to a boiling kettle Genie: So what is your first of many wishes master?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
This is a railway station in Japan that has only one girl use it to go to school. They were going to close it but when they discovered she was using it they vowed to keep it open until she graduates https://www.citylab.com/transportation/2016/01/japan-keeps-this-defunct-train-station-running-for-just-one-passenger/423273/
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Let me guess, you are not DISABLED and your blocking a disabled person from using an adapted toilet and now your complaining about feeling guilty because a disabled person in a wheel chair is waiting because of you
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The last thing someone with depression wants to see is that no matter how hard they try to lead a normal life or despite all their successes, they are still going to kill themselves
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Translation: Youtube: Hi there. We are losing revenue so fast because of our demonetization bullshit that we are trying to scam you into giving us money before we go bankrupt. Everyone: Good. Greedy bastards
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
If a man sleeps with 10 men then the first thing you will notice is the wheel chair. The second thing you will notice is the inflatable ring he is sitting on. finally you will notice how quickly he finishes in the toilet when he goes for a shit so the answer is: He's... In a lot of pain. A hell of a lot of pain
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Then the following week could be 'Everyone's a Cop' week as every low life takes advantage of the apparent black out and start robbing places en masse
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Actually in the 1994 film The Santa Clause, just as Scott takes on the job as Santa, the sleigh flies from one roof top to the roof top next door after escaping from a girls house where delivery of the presents went wrong
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
No, it's not. Popular Muslim costumes are Dalek, Ninja, Letter box, Paranoid old lady behind a door and Seafront Binoculars to name a few
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
If you look the story up online you will find David Schwimmer and the Blackpool police had a little bit of a light hearted exchange about it
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Time to remodel your mail box. Try this: Cut the pole close to the ground but leave about a foot of pole sticking out of the ground. Place a strong steel spring on it and then put the rest of the mail box into the top making sure you have around 4 inches of space between the 2 parts of the pole and fix them into place. Next, attach a handle to the back of the mailbox. Next time that fucker comes along, pull the handle back until it nearly touches the ground and let go. Lets see how long it takes to come back
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Shortly after this video was filmed he lost his beer money as she took it to buy new swimwear that wouldnt make people like me piss ourselves laughing
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
If you consider the view from off your property then you would be safe in the knowledge that the parcel was well hidden. I can beat that though. I ordered a compost bin, a garden strimmer and a hose on a reel. The delivery guy assembled the compost bin in my back yard and put all the other parcels inside. THAT was cool (I sent his company a very grateful email)
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
One day its going to get up and walk out leaving a note saying 'Im sick off being cooped up just for you to treat me like a trophy. You never take me anywhere. Goodbye"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
420, American style calendar 4/20 (April 20th) code-term in cannabis culture that refers to the smoking cannabis, especially smoking cannabis around the time 4:20 p.m. and smoking cannabis in celebration on the date April 20
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I saw something similar to this happen at a local supermarket. The driver got out of his car, sat on his bonnet and with a smile pulled out a store security radio and put on his uniform jacket. He asked someone to clock him in as on duty and when he was called back to say he was on duty he made a request for the police to be called AND HELD THE WOMAN THERE! The Supermarket banned her and recorded the number plate of the car. Just in case they came back
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
This literally is 45 minutes long and is a video of a persons view as they walk around the place. I kept skipping through to see if anything is worth watching and ... its shit. Dont bother watching. You will thank me for it
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Narrator: After Kevins realisation that he hates women that move during sex he bought Tabitha. Since then no graves have been dug up in the local cemetery
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Have you noticed how everyone seems to be trying to sing this song with as deep a voice as possible. I wonder if we can get Tom Storms to give it a blast
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Im sure theres bits missing such as the bit that says at the start: Read all questions before answering and the bit at the end that says: Ignore all questions and just sign your name
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I helped a friend who got ripped off by a security company that fitted the wrong CCTV and then ripped it out and stole his equipment. By the time I had finished the company was given a cease and desist order and they were forced to close down by the courts
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Thats when you spit on the light and it blows the bulb and the dentist sighs and shakes his head, looks at you and says "I said rinse and spit in the basin"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I dont see the problem with breast feeding in public. I mean Im 46 and it does not bother me... although it bothered the police enough when I tried it with the women in the shopping centre
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Its a term created by audioscrobbler that records, with an online music service, a listeners musical preferences so that similar music can be suggested/recommended
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Which solar system are they representing? only theres 11 there and our solar system has 8/9 (Depends on your school of thought about pluto)
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I believe that retail workers should be able to blatantly call out someone for their bullshit straight to their face with out negative consequences. For example, customer: I bought this leather jacket from you and it has a tear! I want my money back and compensation! Till operator (Looks at jacket and notices rival stores tags): Madam, that jacket is not sold here. You bought from *** at a cheaper price now leave. Customer: I want to speak to your manager! Manager comes over: Yes? Customer: I bought this leather jacket from you and it has a tear! I want my money back and compensation! This moron wont pay up! Manager: Fuck off twat or we will call the police
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Tell them to fuck off and proceed to put the screen in the window with the loudest speakers you have and play continuous porn with the wifi list on display in the corner
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
She should have said "This is a talent show not a religious intervention and if you intend to fail me based on my religious beliefs instead of my talent then you should be ashamed of yourselves as it states in the bible
Matthew 7:1-3
Judge not, that ye be not judged.
For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.
And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?
Always know your enemy"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Oh dear, its blocked from being played on other websites. Thank you you tube for that. At least you can click on the logo and watch it on youtube and yes, it is quite funny
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Religion was originally the invention by the upper classes to control and manipulate the weak minded lower classes. Today, it has not changed at all
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
MOMS GREATEST HITS! Buy the album from Al- cohol records and bask in those heady days of your youth as your mom sang you the popular Clean Your Room Right Now and who can forget that beautiful classical You're Grounded You Little Shit or maybe the pull of the yester-year will come from that memorable ditty If You Dont Stop Crying I Will Give You Something To REALLY Cry About. These and many more hits are available for the amazing price of Flowers, Chocolates, A bottle of wine and a card. Order now and get her new hit, With A Slipper and we will throw in the kids response record But Mooooom! entirely free! *Terms and conditions apply
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Aww bless! Proof that religion is still a bunch of moronic bollocks designed to prevent you from making your own life choices and blame an imaginary friend when you act like a douche
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
She is only thinking of him because he wants his glasses back so he can watch the Demolition Derby on TV but she wants to watch some crappy soap opera
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
So what you are saying is that you know the finest details of the theoretical technology in a science fiction TV show which uses currently undiscovered resources from other worlds set in the 23rd century to such a point that you know how to build, program and run a transporter today? Wow! Im impressed! Just remember, the first electrical programmable computer was built in 1943 and now, less than 3 quarters of a century later we have mobile phones with more power than the computers used by NASA for the moon landing. The human Genome was decoded and mapped in 2003. Things are being discovered all the time and science and technology are improving faster with each development so who knows what we will have by the year 2300! We might surpass this idea of transporters and gone beyond that into something we are just not able to conceive!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Move your car to the left and take a wheel off. Leave a note on your car saying 'Gone for new tyre. Had to take the bus' and then on the other car put a note on the wind screen saying ' Sorry I hit your car. I will pay for the damages' Then sit back with a nice cool drink and wait
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Have you ever thought that Playstation and Xbox are actually owned by Sony and Microsoft as one business? Lets say Bill gates, Masaru Ibuka and Akio Morita got together and decided to make the consoles in one company then divided them into the 2 companies and shared ideas on development, design and programming and then started the Xbox/PS rift or 'which is better' to create a fan base so as to increase sales, popularity and free advertising. Today, people are fighting about which is best and buying the better latest machine to show off to the other side and certain games will never appear on the other console... maybe thats to get you to buy both consoles. Meanwhile Bill gates, Masaru Ibuka and Akio Morita are grinning their heads off in a stadium sized room stacked to the rafters with cash.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
She has just got her post-solo private pilot student stripe which means she can fly unaided with supervision but is about to go for her unsupervised pilots license
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Do you know what I have learned about Star Wars 7 on the internet? The hype and film are apparently equal to each other. Im going to have to see it in a week or two because thats when seats will be available
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Thats not a prison camp! Thats a training facility. Every year these places appear and at the appointed time they are sent out, slowly at first, to invade the homes of the people who grumble at christmas and despise the snow. When they arrive the surround the property and make camp there, a silent glowing barricade of christmas. This is why you always see houses covered in lit up decorations but never see the home owners putting them up... beware the glowing inflatable christmas invaders!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Ha! Its the real version by Queen! Under Pressure not that wanker rip off lying bastard Robert Matthew Van Winkle who called himself vanilla ice
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
They say its cruel to pack all those baby chicks tightly together in one small place. Bullshit! Look at that one, Its smiling and waving!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The day I need to be told what to talk about will be the day I leave this planet. Whats next? Music that you should listen to? Art you should look at? Porn you should wank to?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Imagine how much money they could make! One company offers to clean up the air for a fee and it sells bricks and all they have to do is rig up a bunch of vacuum pipes around the city leading to their workshops and turn on the vacuum pump and fire up the kilns
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
We in the UK have put clear plastic domes on the top with coin slots in the sides at angles to make the coin spin around the cone. Entertains the kids and stops rubbish being shoved into it
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
If he was to make it rechargeable with a dome like mounting, move the LEDs closer to each other and a good motorised liquid cooling system he could probably make that more practical
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Old trick but a good one. Just dont do it from the bedroom. I did. My fiancee went down to answer the phone and I asked her to bring me up a coffee. She did it but later that day she bought a new twin handset phone and set the other one up on my side of the bed
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Sooooo, God hates kids so much that he wont give them any sweets and will butcher them and rip out their brains before slicing up a knife scar smile on there faces before setting fire to their insides. Lovely! I think I will stay an atheist because that way I dont have an invisible child hating pyromaniac psycho to worry about.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Skip the first 3 minutes and 20 seconds, fight ends at 4 minutes 5 seconds. Nothing special either side and the fight was dull. Girl in black wins
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
She is saying "Later, we can edit the weird shit onto the green screen areas and make these kids look like a bunch of freaks, weirdos and perverts!"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
In the UK 47% of the electricity in the first 3 months of this year was generated from renewable sources such as wind, hydro and solar and there are plans to continue. It's impossible to implement a full change over in one go, but we are replacing resource hungry power stations as and when possible. America has 18% but the American public are demanding more cleaner renewable energy sources and predict over 50% of their power requirements from the sources in approximately 30 years. All this takes money and time and requires setting up before switching over. This advert is basically saying they incest in clean renewable energy.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
There will be a post on here soon from some guy saying he pretends to get stuck because he thinks its cute how his wife pretends to know what to do when he can see her reflection and watch her look it up on her phone
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Despite the fact that pharmaceutical companies all over the world sell the same medications for a lot less and still don't have financial worries at all the American public will still sit there and say "That sounds about right" when in fact they are being ripped off. Honestly, its no good talking to them. When it comes to the truth they all become Trump and shove their fingers in their ears. All you can really say is "You know what to do. Do it" and then walk away
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
That's a boiler cupboard. You fit a wall mounted Combination boiler first then the cupboard over it when you fit a new kitchen to hide the boiler.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
You will find the captain and crew are fully aware of this and have reduced power to the engine to prevent excessive life threatening damage. They would have already called ahead to whatever airport that can take them of the situation and there is a very high chance that the passengers have been told that there is a problem, and they will be diverting to whatever airport is closest
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Hmmm. Where did I put them? mmm? nope. wait ! I know where they are! I put them next to the fucks! I don't think I will give any fucks or any shits either! scamming twat deserves it. Did you know a pack of 48 andrex toilet rolls is for sale on eBay for £82? Usually they cost around £15 to £18 so yeah fuck him and the bullshit he rode in on
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Instead of complaining try finding a suitable alternative. Eco-warriors piss me off because they demand we stop polluting but wont do anything to fix the problem except stage protests
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Showed this picture to my 8 year old niece. She thought it was a shop for sledges. I asked her why does she think its closed and she looked at me like I'm an idiot and said "Durr! No snow!" Such is the life of a middle aged uncle
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I bet when she got home there were a bunch of cops waiting for with guns drawn. They take ALL your details when they impound your car including your name and address
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Most countries have laws in place that prevent parents from giving their kids stupid names that can cause offence, embarrassment or harm. I seriously doubt she would have been allowed to name her child Vagina even if she asked for special permission
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I'm currently working out how many sausages you can get out of the average pig. It's going quite well but the badge and handcuffs keep getting stuck in the blades.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
He is wrong. Put your finger on the surface of a mirror and look carefully at the point of contact. Your finger hovers above your reflection by the distance equal to the thickness of the glass. You can never kiss yourself in a mirror
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
2 possible answers 1- Oh, so your dad could not let go of the past to such an extent that he had to name you after a slave? 2- Wow! What a coincidence! My Aunt was named after a favourite slave they once owned!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Ah yes, but did you know the highest toilet in the world is on Mount Everest at 23,058 feet above see level? I too can make pointless searches
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
What a vicious pair of bitches! Poor moose minding its own business when a random human woman slaps him for no reason and when he has recovered from the shock her sister slaps him! I mean come on! I thought Canadians were supposed to be nice. I wouldn't have thought them to be moose abusers. I'm so disappointed.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The one on the right wishes she does. The other one cant complain, literally, being raped and not being allowed to complain is part of their culture
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
How about making a channel with a bridge over the area so that when the next rock slide happens it goes under the bridge and the channels can direct the rocks away from the supports. It would be cheaper than digging the road out
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
My neighbours dog does the same thing but not because it knows it cant have it but because she makes a new stuffed toy out of stronger materials and puts the squeaker inside. We suspect the dog does this on purpose
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
People wont accept the challenge unless there was some danger involved like used syringes and razors. There's going to be a lot of clean play areas.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Tell the world that these are publicity shots of a male version of tomb raider and then cover your ears from the feminist banshee shriek as they rage about how it should not be allowed whilst defending films such as ghostbusters 2016 and oceans 8. It will be hilarious!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
If I woke up next to either of them in the morning I would jump out of bed screaming and thinking who the fuck is sick enough to dig up a corpse and put it in my bed!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I had one. looked like it was spongy as wet toilet paper but was as hard as a brick and I wish I was hit in the face with it. The alternative was not so nice
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The poster is not wrong. It's an entomopathogenic fungus. The infected spiders are able to live on in a zombie-like state enveloped by the fungus. Slowly the fungus consumes their living tissue and kills them
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
First thing you want to do is stop knocking the fucking printer! If its not that then turn the cooling fan down, make sure the bed is secure and reduce the print speed. If that does not work then check the belts make sure the tension is the same all round. Make sure the drive couplers are secured to the stepper motors, clean and oil the rods while checking they are not bent. Judging by the look of the print its been constantly knocked while its printing and the bed purposely jammed.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
When having brain surgery the doctor usually gives you a complex task that you can do. This is so they can monitor any degradation to fine motor skills, memory and other brain functions. If the quality of the task degrades even slightly the surgeon knows something is wrong and can either correct it or stop.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I had to look it up and it does say fresh spring rolls! I bet the best part of the joke is her name is Summer and she ain't exactly fresh. She is a bit chubby though so they got the rolls right
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I know for a fact her ashes could have been considered for carry on and no one would bat an eyelid. Hell, they may have been given some respect as I have known some airlines to offer a spare seat for the urn.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Wind the window down and your blind spot will be cleared. Next time don't park like a dick. There's a bloody good reason why you cant park there and it s what makes the difference between a happy kid and a dead one
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Han: Ok Chewwy, time to break our recotd on the Kess... Chewwy: Rawaaarrrwaarroorr Han: Fine! If you want to be called Ben then I will call you Ben! You still wont become a Jedi you know
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Im still trying to find the audio frequency just outside of human hearing that the Echo picks up so that I can program a virus that spreads world wide and on April fools day at 9am GMT it says "Alexa, play Rick Astley-Never gonna give you up"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I checked out the page. Its real and creepy as fuck when you realise that the bathroom looks like something out of an abandoned house horror movie. It also makes you wonder how many of the guys in the bath of milk have been seen lately
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Or, if its such a stupid game (idle games usually are) delete it rather than build an overly complicated system just to tap a screen. Which could easily be replicated with a touchscreen pen, a motor and an ice lolly stick cam
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
It was remodelled in view of all the kiddy fiddling arrests but the inscription on the bottom is latin and reads: Ecce puer, et comedent panem in uteri mei (Behold child and eat of the bread of my loins)
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
If your man buys you a piece of string for your neck at $20 then you had better let him put the pearls on it without a word of complaint
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Creepy part is the kid wearing them only went in to the forest less than 10 minutes ago and then you ran in after hearing the blood curdling scream
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The way I would follow up on that would be to take the pen and put the nib against my hand and say "Now, can I have your phone number"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Im looking forward to Celebrity Big Browser where they spend 6 weeks looking at the browsing history of 8 Z-list celebrities and disconnecting the one voted off for the most boring searches
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Ive played enough fallout 4 to recognise a radiation storm. Whip out the Rad-X and keep some Radaway on hand and get a hours sleep
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Mom: Nooooo! Why have you taken my son! WHY!?!?!
Son: Mom, I was just taking a nap
Mom (whispering): Shutthefuckup, your ruining the effect
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Everyone has at least one favourite teacher. Mine was a maths teacher called Mr Bradshaw. He was a massive man with a huge bushy beard that ZZ top would have been proud of and was a biker. All his lessons were based on his bike to some degree such as working out the area of the piston head and calculating the best route to use exactly one tank of fuel from location A to location B. He wore biker leathers all day and rode Harley Davidson Ironhead Sportster XLH 1000. Coolest teacher in the school and also the kindest
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
My other half found out I was 5ft 6in when we first met. I asked her if it was a problem and she said "Congratulations, you found one woman who does not give a fuck about height" We unintentionally met in a Game store as we were supposed to meet up for coffee (First date) and were buying games for our Xbox ones. We have been together for 7 years now and we play together
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
First of all I don't give a fuck who loves who as long as its not forced upon another. We have all had the line "How do you know you don't like it if you haven't tried it?" But I do have to say that Adidas got it wrong. Valentines day celebrates the saint Valentinus of Rome.He was imprisoned for performing weddings for soldiers (Soldiers were not allowed to marry on the grounds that it would weaken them) who were forbidden to marry and for ministering to Christians, who were persecuted under the Roman Empire. According to legend, during his imprisonment, Saint Valentine healed the daughter of his jailer, Asterius, and before his execution, he wrote her a letter signed "Your Valentine" as a farewell. So it is about getting martyred for performing marriages against the orders of the catholic church
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Swapping one fantasy being that does not exist for another, way to go you fucking god botherer! At least Santa is a FUN bit of fiction that makes people smile
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Im assuming that the guns are not loaded and have empty clips and that the instructor said something along the lines of "Normally, pointing a gun behind some one is not safe but due to lack of space you should have checked your side arms are not loaded and ensured the safety is on AND checked by me, the instructor" Its good to see some people take the time to learn to use a gun properly by taking courses in gun safety
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Now then Mr H.Hog. You were all over the road so for your safety and the safety of other take a deep breath and then breath out until I say stop
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I didnt watch the video because I knew just how hilarious it was going to be. Welcome to Uberhumor where the jokes are all about tits and tears
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Hello? Uberhumor? Do you know what the definition of your websites name is. Lets break it down shall we... UBER: Designating a person or thing that exceeds the norms or limits of its kind or class. HUMOR: Comical writing or talk in general; comical books, skits, plays, etc. I hope you get the idea now. Stop posting tits, death and depression
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
So, here we have a modern lock on a rusty old tin that is not air tight but untarnished coins inside with a very recent photo of a sheep. Im guessing it was planted by the OP hoping no one would notice
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Today, scientists schooled in the recreation of extinct species using CGI and 3D modelling were given the full skeleton of one of these beasts. Their task was to recreate as much of the creature as possible and in this task the scientists excelled and went above and beyond. They learned that these magnificent behemoths spent hours gazing at themselves in still pools and were very affectionate. They tended to like everything and gathered in large social groups. The final triumph was when they were able to create the mating call of the bull Platybeladon and played it back to the world to revel in. Across the amphitheater where they made their presentation the call could be heard for 10 miles "YOLO!"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
As the reboot is just a gender reversal feminist propaganda stunt I will eagerly look forward to the Ghostbusters 2 reboot where they have to admit to how a single dad protects his child from the forces of evil while the mother abandons them both and pisses off around the world without giving a shit about them
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Easily beaten. Take a circuit tester and touch the first pin on one lug and touch the same pin on the others. You get a continuity signal and you have your connection. Probably take no more than 2 minutes
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The red bull one could have been beaten by saying "Thats like walking into McDonalds and getting arrested for indecent exposure by performing an indecent act with a burger then winning compensation based on their advert saying 'Im loving it!'"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The other budgie will pass away very soon. Im not being cruel but its a sad fact that when 2 budgies are this close, the surviving budgie pines to death
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Whilst sitting in a hospital in Washington, this man was visited by the armies insurance claims officer. He said to the soldier "Choose one part of your body and we will pay you a dollar for each inch from one end to the other" The soldier said my right leg from my hip to my knee" The officer asked "Wheres your hip?" and he pulled out a tap measure and the soldier placed the end on his hip. "Wheres your knee?" asked the officer "Somewhere in Afghanistan" said the soldier
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
UPS. Trying to draw the house with the X in it without taking your pencil off the map: Moron division. Never leave the maps out when they run out of blank paper but not red crayons
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I bet there was a surge on google for Dancing person with round bits on chest, what is it? They have no idea what they are until you put them on the internet
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Tell him he is right and that you are in fact the bogey man and you have been luring him into a false sense of security ready for when he next tries to catch the tooth fairy
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I bet the guy will wear that T-shirt and hat with pride. He will tell his friends of the big friendly guy on the train that gave him these gifts straight off his back. And when the shirt is old, discoloured and tatty, he will fold it carefully and put it in a box and put it somewhere safe. With a fond tear in his eye he will hold it to his very carefully hold it to his cheek every day while still wearing the hat and remember the Big Friendly Guy
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
This should be a wake up call to everyone about the nature of all these places that put money over the well being of their staff. Black list these places and find a job elsewhere. With what is happening right now a lot of crooked companies are not going to come out of this intact
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
"He likes to gnaw the bones of paedophiles, drag the souls of the wicked to hell, swim in lava pools and drink the blood of the damned. Oh, and he loves belly rubs!"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Read the title of the website and see if that is where this belongs unless you want us to laugh at you not having a mom any more or do you want us to laugh at the fact your mom is dead?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Do you really think we want to sit here for 3 minutes looking at a dogs eyebrows? 20 seconds is enough to get the idea so cut it short and move on
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I love the launch video that shows the indestructible glass in action when they threw a small steel ball at it twice. It broke the two windows they threw it at
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I've always felt he looked like patient zero in any deadly highly contagious disease movie just before he becomes contagious and bleeds from the nose
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
That thing looks like a minor demon that sucks the souls of its owners while they sleep and as it consumes souls it grows the missing parts
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
What about someone who wants a Posh Wank? Some guys like to cover up when they flick the flesh whip and this condom needs 2 people to open it. Cue the frustrated calls of "Mom, Can you come here a minute?"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I would consider that an awesome gift from my dad. My dad gives me £20 in a birthday card. I'm glad he doesn't make his own money and works for it instead
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Ok. Lets get this flat earth crap sorted out once and for all. I was asked "If the world is round, why doesn't the water fall off the bottom?" I said "Take a snooker ball. Make it the blue one as its meant to be calming and holds the attention of the mentally retarded. Place it on the palm of your hand and place your other hand on top. Are you sure thats the top? How about randomly rotating the ball and place your hands one the bottom and the top. Are you sure thats the top? I mean you did that earlier and said that was the top but that part is not where you have put the top hand on. The reason why the water does not fall off is because it is smart enough to know there is no top or bottom to a ball which makes water smarter than a flat earther"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Kid: One of the muppet scream bags is leaking
Shop keeper: Oh no! Its going to leak everywhere
Kid: It's ok. I refilled it
Shop keeper: I didn't hear any screaming?
Kid: I didn't say I refilled it with screams...
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Ive seen this one so many times that this guys parents must have tons of the same wrapping paper and spent a lot of time buying him a gift with the same dimensions just so he can crack the old tired joke that his parents have wrapped the present (again) in a pair of tits
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
If you see a wall of mist against the windows follow these simple steps. Kill the first person to spout any religious end of the world crap. Dont go outside. Stay away from the screams. Board up the windows. (Spoiler alert) dont kill each other thinking there is no hope as it is only temporary
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Either this is a fake or the owner really did open his iPhone and is choosing the cheaper option of paying for its disposal rather than paying the extortionate cost for it to be repaired. Apple may even sue him for tampering with it
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
First find the directory then the PDF you want to open then right click the PDF. Select open with then click on Word. Click on the OK button when prompted. Click on Save As, name it and click save and viola. And no, I'm not a millennial. I was born in the early '70s
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Bullshit! Little dude has worked out how to extract in concentrate the THC from weed and tested a tiny amount of his magic happy water
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Her text message reads: Ok mom. It took me a while but Im now sitting on a big hard black knob. Its not as much fun as you said it would be and to be honest its very uncomfortable
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
His remains were found on the beach. Coroners discovered that he had been bludgeoned to death by a shark carrying a rock before being eaten
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Traffic cones are the bane of all drivers worldwide! How can these ass hats be classed as heroes? Unless the post is the police are the heroes
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Wait until she reads the title to this post "LADY FRIEND! FUCKING LADY FRIEND! I dont suppose all those blow jobs and anal penetrations count as being YOUR FUCKING GIRLFRIEND YOU PRICK!!!"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
What would be more effective would be if the 'actual muslims' frog marched all the arsehole muslims, ISIS supporters and and shia law beggars into the streets and cut their fucking heads off
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
He was later arrested and cuddled as he cried for being emasculated by the shop staff and made to look the moronic loser he is. He was then ordered to serve 5 years in preschool class where he is currently being bullied by a 4 year old called Sally
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I still enjoy asking for a mug of white coffee and acting like I have no idea what they are talking about when they start saying "A Large latte?" and other types of coffee. Some have got wise around where I live and actually have White/Black Coffee Large/Medium/Small on the menu (They are also the ones with the most customers)
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
They usually keep their looks until about 70 then boom! The whole lot goes to pot. They must have a gland that produces a blood bourne preservative
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Im very impressed! I hope you encourage her to be more creative. Who knows where it will one day lead. I would love to see her animate a full story
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
This needs something. Lets see now. I know! How about some fucking sense! If we dont know what your on about then we wont find it funny
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Heres a hint: If the top of the post touches the top of the browser page and you still cant see the bottom then its too long. Make it shorter or dont post it. I may be TooMuchTimeOnMyHands but Im not BlessedWithInfinitePatience
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I can see it now, her in bed with her boyfriend and she whispers "Are you wearing protection?" and he smiles and taps his hip with his knuckles and the sound of ringing steel is heard
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I installed windows 10 and after it fucked up my entire computer I used the special back to previous version uninstall option which fucked it up further. I ended up reformatting and re-installing my operating system. Fuck Windows 10!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
A worm place? I hope you got them some medicine for those dogs then. Last thing you need is a pack of hounds butt scuttling across the floor of your business
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I was about to give a homeless guy £5 when I asked why he didnt have a home. I was expecting some hardship story but instead, he told me "I dont want to own property because I dont want the responsibility of paying bills and taxes and I dont have to work" Now, I put my £5 back in my pocket and said "You dont want this then, you dont like owning property" I dont know if he was too honest or just bloody stupid but he did go from homeless to begging hippy and no one local ever gives him or any other homeless person anything in our town centre
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Do some chocolate filled ones too. Fill them up with Diabetic chocolate and get as much as you can in there then laugh your ass off whilst they spend a few hours shitting theirs off!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Can I have the vegan option where I eat what ever I like without the judgemental ass trying to guilt trip me out of eating a nice juicy medium rare rib eye?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The BBCs standards have slipped so much that the government is talking about banning the TV licence. Personally I think they should ban the BBC
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Walking in that zigzag pattern reduces the gradient of the hill and walking on the balls of your feet shifts you balance forward and increases your stability. The whole thing also reduces how much energy you need to expend too.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Fake. The corner and edges of the grass as well as the actual look of it are the result of at least a few years of settling plus the seams between each piece of turf would be very noticeable until spring next year and those trees would have made too much recovery in such a short amount of time. My guess would be the work was done 2-3 years ago
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
We have become a less wasteful society. You can tell by the way they used the fattest woman they could find on the billboard so as not to waste any paper
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Venus Williams is nearly 40 so my guess is she is getting to old now and will be thinking retiring soon seeing as a 15 year old beat her
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
What would be cool would be if you went hunting with a rifle that is really a camera. When you get back to the lodge or safari HQ they look at the photos you took and 3D print the head to life size, add skin and/or fur and you take it home with you or have it sent to you when its ready
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Snipers usually aim at the base of cigarette smoke to get a head shot. Smoking a pipe saved his life as it has a long stem and the sniper did not realise it was a pipe
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Actually, this little fella has a gland at the base of its penis that excretes a slow acting fatal poison that is absorbed through skin contact which it does by rubbing its penis and testicles against its victim. This guy literally humps its victims to death
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Let me guess. Some pretentious prick AKA the OP saw this at college and took a photo of it then posted it here hoping to convince people that they know a lot about electronics and then forgot to put a title or claim on it. In case your wondering everyone, its the design for the magnetic housing on an electric motor or dynamo or more accurately a rotating field
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
And less than 5 seconds I turn off. What I did see looks like a 70's soap opera including the shit music and poor sound quality with matching clothes and style
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
That kids grandfather is dead and you give him a C? What the fuck is wrong with you? You got it wrong not this kid! Give that poor little fucker an A then ditch this question from your test!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
So magnificent, so majestic, so... *Derp* moving on to the Winkywanky bird this unusual breed masturbates every time it blinks. YOU BOY! Stop throwing sand in its eyes!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Yet he can see the length of time from the beginning to the end and all universes during and his smile says he can see deep into your soul. The sad part is he could teach us the meaning of the universe and why we are here but all he can say is woof
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Keanu Reeves looks more like a Wooly Willy picture! I bet he brushes his hair, beard and moustache every morning with a magnetic pen
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Was he told he was innocent and then sent to prison for 40 years or was he released from prison after 40 years when the judge declared him innocent after new a
evidence proved it?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Yes, I know I'm supposed to start with a capital F but I let go of the shift key a fraction of a second too early and didn't notice.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I've seen the films. Nothing good comes from a green meteor. Looks like the next problem is coming from Australia. It's a good job this didn't happen in China. They would eat it!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
From what I have 'dug up' around 23 to 26% more unarmed white people are killed per annum by police action in America. Black lives matter but white lives have no value apparently. Shove your sign where the sun don't shine!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
She may not be amazing looking but if she does those moves while sitting on your dick then she can be a lazy eyed buck toothed ginger and you wouldn't care
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Fucking hoarders! Elderly couple down the road from us could not get any toilet roll. We had 9 rolls and gave them 4. They were practically in tears. First cunt that knocks my door selling toilet rolls and hand sanitizer is getting a hammer to the teeth and all their stock stolen and redistributed around the area to families, elderly and disabled people first. Then I'm dragging the fucker to the healthy households to introduce them to the people who are suffering because of their bullshit
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I have found that the bast way to bring a woman to climax with just your hands is to practice sign language as fast as you can whilst shaking your hands quickly
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Or start it properly by cracking open the booze at 7pm December the 22nd and staying wankered until January the 5th and spending December the 31st to January the 1st shout at the neighbours "I...I...I...I love you ya bastards! Gis a kiss! 'Appy new ye-ah!" Now stop looking at my pint! Did...did... did ja spill my missus? I'll 'ave ya!"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
He went down on all of them but what made him puke himself unconscious? Did he rim one and she farted and followed through or did one of them turn out to be a guy?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Thats pretty damn decent of them. Around here we score each other on the accuracy of where each one lands. Car roof is 50 points, bonnets 75 and if you get it on something like the bumper or spoiler you get declared the all out winner. The only rule is the firework can only be launched legally which is upwards and in a safe area
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Rinderpest: [Yawns] I'll get the kettle on, I know you are not up to infections until you've hade your first cup of coffee. What do you want for breakfast?
SmallPox: Sod that! Give me 5 more decades
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I get the feeling that she caught him and said why? With his sense of humour his reply was probably "Well, Im looking for pointers for when my babies fill out a bit more"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The daily mail isnt exactly what we in the UK call reliable. Or trust worthy, accurate, realistic in fact a lot of our comedians use it as the butt of their jokes such as "Its in the Daily Mail so it has to be true" [Audience explodes into laughter]
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I seriously doubt that this is natural as to make a purple flame like this you need Potassium Chloride (Salt Substitute) and Strontium Nitrate and as both are not naturally occurring I would have to say that the photographer put the mixture in him/her self
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
As the moon orbits the earth it always keeps the same side facing the earths surface. As it moves into the eastern side of the northern hemisphere and the horizon into the southern hemisphere, it is upside down. Quick experiment. Take a tennis ball and a ping pong ball. Draw and arrow on the ping pong ball and draw a level line horizontally around the tennis ball. Put the ping pong ball about 6 inches away from the tennis ball above the line. Move the ping pong ball around the tennis ball keeping the arrow facing the tennis ball and watch the arrows orientation
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Pretty much all cinemas couldn't give a toss if you bring your own food with you just as long as you dont bring something stupid like porridge or mashed potatoes
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Tell the protesters to go back to work and rebuild the local economy and when they get sick, the nurses and doctors will be waiting for them. Then they should take the details of each protester "To save time later"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I hope this dumb fucker gets locked up! What stupid cunt shoots at a little dog in the first place? At least the video footage wasn't 'lost' or 'corrupted'. Stupid bastard! I hope the girl is ok
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Place a large net below the window and then rapicly thump the window frame with the palm of your hand. Window sills slope down away from the window so the vibration will shake it loose. Then go down and collect it from the net
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Not yet. For the past 8 years Ive been trying to find a metal song where I can only remember the opening guitar riff. You can exactly search for Der din, diddly din, diddly diddly diddly din, der din, diddly din, diddly diddly diddly din, der din, diddly din, diddly diddly diddly din, Dan dan dan dan dah dan dan dah, dan dan dan dan din dan dan dah and then it went into the lyrics which I cant remember but would sound something like Dada da di da daaaa, dada da di da daaaaaa-aaaaaa. I wish I could find it through that description
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Oh for fucks sake! I Tell these wankers to fuck off when they come to my door and now they are invading our homes through the internet on humour sites!Well, FUCK OFF!!! Bible bashing God bothering moronic fucked up pieces of rancid whale shit.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Normally, for a humour site, I look at a video and think "Wheres the funny in that?" I enjoyed listening to her play so much I watched it 2 more times
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
With the amount of compensation being paid out for personal injuries and death caused by American police officers, they soon won't be able to afford a police force
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Despite Trump trying to steal medical research, withdrawing funding to the WHO in a time of crisis and blaming the WHO for playing down Covid-19 when they in fact warned the world, attempting to embezzle the emergency funds for the pandemic by firing the guy in charge of oversight for the allocation of funds saying "I am in charge of the oversight" He will still get re-elected based on the platform of no one in America deserves universal health care and too many Americans agreeing with him.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
In the UK you cant return things because you don't want them. There has to be a fault with what you have purchased. Too Many does not count
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
If you want a more accurate and live updated statistic of the corona virus world wide and by country. You can even compare countries with unbiased results: https://corona.help/
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Fucking hell! In this woke society you can't say shit without upsetting anyone but when you rag on a birth defect you might as well paint a target on your back and hand out shotguns!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I bet the dumb ass was expecting the Fed Ex guy to sneak up on him, gently tap him and run off before anyone noticed he was there leaving behind a card
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
1 week into no nut November and I'm really loving it! While you guys are sitting on your clouds feeling righteous I'm fucking your girlfriends, wives and fiancees when they feel neglected. Luckily I'm not the only one who doesn't do no nut November because there's a lot of lonely desperate ladies out there
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Channel 4, a british tv channel, has blocked this video in my country, britain, on copyright grounds. How the fuck does that work... oh yeah, its youtube. It doesnt work
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Comes to something where you have to use a VPN to get round a fucking youtube copyright. Oh, the American TV bosses always edit things to sensationalise them where in the UK we prefer realism. I mean, have you seen how much shitty reality TV we have to put up with?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Watch this get voted down faster than a brick dropped from a plane: I bet he will be singing a different tune when he gets kicked out of office for being a total twat as everyone who voted for him realise they are next on the chopping block
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I think she should go home and learn to talk English and THEN come back. Just so she can understand what I wrote: A frink see shol grow ome an rearn to tor proper ingrish den see come back. Seriously, all these bullshit rallies over race suddenly cropping up... Looks like the racist card is starting to falter when it comes to using it for getting out of the shit "I hit him because he is a racist white man and I thought he would rape me!" "My dear, thats the chief of police. He was returning your purse" What needs to be done is a full national campaign making people aware that the law says about racism and that EVERYONE can be racist no matter where they come from
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
America does not approve of helping others less fortunate than themselves unless there is something in it for them and even then that has to be more than the value of the amount paid.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The predictable replies from the brainwashed minions who don't realise that they are not paying for health care but pouring money into the insurance companies boss's luxury yacht fund. What you are getting is not what you are paying for. I'm going to leave it there as I know what the responses will be because of the drip fed propaganda that controls you. It's like watching They Live with Roddy Piper with the Insurance companies as the aliens. OBEY, BREED, SLEEP
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
As a kid, the world holds many wonders, marvels and mysteries and your young mind craves to experience everything. As you get older the secrets behind everything that you amazed by as a kid are revealed. Some things you lose interest in and some you don't. The ones you lose interest in you no longer learn about and your knowledge wanes as time goes by. As you get even older, the remaining interests fall away as you out grow some of them and you no longer learn about them as you reach adult hood you concentrate on what you already know and ignore the things that you have little or no interest in. Finally you reach a point where you feel you have learned everything you can about what you know and love and look back on what you used to know and realise that you still want to learn it all but it has changed so much you can't connect with you past interests and loves and the younger generation have surpassed what you know. They then mock you for your lack of current knowledge and skill in a pursuit you loved as a child but take comfort that one day they will be standing where you are now being mocked for not knowing what they once knew.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The reason the X chromosome has more DNA is so that they can contain the genetic blueprint for memory storage so that when you forget your anniversary they wont, and have enough memories stored up for a lifetime of bitching. Basically, the extra DNA is for Bitch mode storage and ammo
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
"We are to make peace with those who have wronged us" Kinda ruins the overall sentiment. Sort of like "You got killed but it was your fault. Thats OK though, we forgive you. You may have lost loved ones but we are the victims"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
You do know that Trump cant submit his years notice until November the 4th 2019 which means the whole thing wont be accepted, signed, stamped and sealed until the day after the next American presidential election and can be cancelled instantly
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Where do I start? I mean, the kid should be going to the toilet on his own judging by his age and I KNOW MacDonalds has a child changing facility so why the fuck would you change your kid on a table especially in a food establishment. Yeah, I know its McDonalds so no one would be able to tell the difference and she can do with laying off the burgers herself! I bet she hasn't even seen a salad. Why haven't the staff done anything is another thing that makes my jaw drop.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
That Star of David... hows that working out for you? Good news, you didn't get hit. Score 1 for your religious icon. Bad news, you need a new windscreen. Minus 1 for the Icon. Your wife didn't get hit... jusy is out on that one
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
"Bring 20 steaks and a bag of juicy bones to the dog park in 24 hours or Squeaky toy comes back one piece at a time (sad slow squeak can be heard in the background)"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Yeah the problem is for a video it has to be in landscape not portrait which would indicate that this is supposed to be a GIF which is something this site does not support so the only logical conclusion is this is a trick to get someone to click on it thinking its a video
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Already there are people on here spewing the propaganda they have been spoon fed since the day they were born. I'm expecting to see more Americans to appear and defend the very people ripping them off under the false belief that the world is suffering and America is winning the health lottery. Per 1,000 people the UK has 27% more hospital beds than the USA. A recorded birth rate that is 3% higher than USA. Female life expectancy at birth? UK is ranked 30th and USA 43rd. Male life expectancy at birth? UK is ranked 18th and USA ranked 42nd. Combined the UK is ranked 22nd and USA is ranked 40th. When it comes to ovesity the USA beats the UK as the UK ranked 3rd but USA, with 33% more, is number 1! The chance to die before 60 is 29% higher in USA than it is in the UK. The value to cost of healthcare in the UK is 74% higher than USA. The UK is ranked 7th and USA ranked 41st. Thats the price you pay for identical treatments in both countries with identical results, medications and treatment. The quality of the health care system in place? UK 14th, USA 23rd.
The Commonwealth Fund’s research showed that while Americans pay the highest healthcare costs, they also have the lowest healthcare outcomes. Mortality rates in the United States are higher than other developed countries, and the average life expectancy is 60.
The American healthcare industry was worth $24.7 billion in 1960. It is now worth $3,504 trillion. So the cost of running the entire system for free by taking 5% out of the currently paid taxes from say, the military budget would not only be feasible but ridiculously simple. Why, it could be run from the interest of that money alone! This is more obvious when you realise 1.4 million Americans went overseas for medical care in 2017 to get a better deal.
Now this is what will happen next, the brainwashed masses will start screaming at how healthcare is much better in the US despite all of the horror stories coming from USA caused by the cost of health care and the lack of actual access when it is needed and what you stand to lose if you need hospital treatment. PLEASE AMERICA! Stop and look at the facts outside of the US propaganda filled reports. Look at France. They are ranked number 1 for health care! While the UK is 18th USA is ranked 37th!
The only reason for that is the cost of healthcare. It's a blatant rip off that has no additional benefits that you would get anywhere else. Actimmune in USA costs $52,321 for 12 vials (£40802) In the UK it costs £5400 for 12 vials ($6924) making it $46,921 cheaper! but you know what the best part of it is? It's free as any person taking it would not be able to work and would be on benefits.
PLEASE DEMAND PROPER HEALTHCARE AMERICA! IT IS YOUR RIGHT!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I wonder if the next statue will be sponsored by the NRA and will be bunch of guns in the shape of a throne with the shooter sitting on it and a plaque saying 'Guns don't kill people' for the kids and the teachers to flip off as they pass by to their classes
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Pointless. The auction house will just cancel the sale and return the painting to the seller stating any attempt to acquire money through them and destroying the auctioned piece is considered fraud.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
If I was the owner/manager I would have taken her name and address, phone number and picture and told her next time she would receive the correct treatment for someone of her stature. Then I would have put her name and picture up on the permanently banned wall for all to see including the reason why. The name and address would be kept on file in case the police are required
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Yay America! I will just zap myself with my NHS medication which has cost me £0.00 before I go get my microscope and violin. You know needs to be done so stop listening to the propaganda and do something about it
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
This is racism but not the way you think it is. It degrades black people by portraying them as vile and evil. While there are those that need a good slap the same can also be said about any race or religion around the world. That they wont be happy until every last non-black is their slave. What this sort of thing does is make blacks look more racist. We have had our apology all we need is to live together as equals but its never going to happen when you have dumb fuckers doing shit like this as it rams a wedge into the gap between races and widens it. Next time you want to protest about unfairness, think very hard about the people you are affecting and not just the ones you are targeting
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Even more so now that Trump is blackmailing European countries into saying that Iran had violated the agreements about nuclear weapons just to justify his attack. If we dont he will put a 25% tax on car imports to America
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The score does not bother me. If the figures are correct then a lot of people read my comment. I suspect some one has more time on their hands than me and opened a lot of tabs and down voted my comment as much as they can. What ever makes you happy
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Because we will not have to put up with the Kardashians resulting in less desperate suicides and thus allowing a greater number of survivors rather than losing 90% of them when they find out that the Kardashians as still alive
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
It says anyone who speaks out against discrimination whether its about race or sexual preference is good and fine in my books but I would love to see Kanye get his faced caved in with a baseball bat
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Actually, Russia is making regular attacks on ISIS targets in Syria. It would be nice to know that they are giving them the fuel back in the form of exhaust fumes from planes and missles
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Same here. Fuck those sites who try to force you into having adverts! Uberhumor looks pretty bare when the adblocker is running... which is all the time
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Kanye is a sanctimonious ass hole who believes he is above everyone else no matter how many times he has made himself look like a prick. ANYONE else who came out with this would instantly get my respect but its Kanye. Nothing is good and fine about Kanye. Read up on how he treats his staff and you will not have any respect for him either. In this video he rambles on like a 5 year old grasping for attention before getting to the point that everyone else has come to around the world in the last 30ish seconds of the video. As for my friends... they want to hold him down while I get the bat. Maybe you should read the comments properly instead of skipping the parts you know make your comments invalid. For example, I want to see Kanye beaten to a pulp. Just Kanye. Only Kanye. If this video featured anyone else that wasnt Kanye I would have agreed with them but still commented "Bit long winded, wish he/she got to the point a bit quicker" and then made a positive comment about their point of view. Its not the subject but the fact its Kanye. Get it now? I dont like Kanye. Now, lets see if that sinks in or are you going to accuse me of more homophobia? Tell you what, why not throw in a racism accusation too. Im sure my friends would love a laugh at that
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
HEY! Stick to the script! There was only one wolf in the original Little Red Riding Hood story! Stop putting logic into a fairy story! And dont you dare get me started on the 3 little pigs!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Add to that the formation of the tear indicates her tear duct seems to be located on the opposite side of the eye than everyone elses
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Lets say the kid does 8 subjects at school and gets A+ on all of them. Dad will have to hand over $4000 to his kid. But what if he has 4 kids and they ALL get A+ in 8 subjects each... I really doubt he will be laughing. There will be tears but not from laughing
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Apparently iPhone batteries are dimensional anchors and when it fails parts that are not from this dimension zip beck to the other dimensions
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Tried it once. She started fucking everyone on the internet. You know how some Christmas presents are really expensive? In 1998 I gave her a divorce. I'm still paying for it today! My current fiancee and I prefer to stay engaged. Sort of like being married without the paperwork and if we split up we wont need legal representation. Winner!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Nope. I was taken to one by a friend (They went as a Klingon, how imaginative) and I tell you now, nerds have it made when it comes to filing ammo in the spank bank! It's a masturbaters paradise!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
LoCo Living Tibunal: He isnt with her any more. Her parents actually helped him get away from her. The point I'm making is all a woman has to do is put on the tears and the man is fucked. Even though a man can defend himself he can't because he will become the villain every time. Even if the woman was stabbing him and he punched her to escape she would turn on the tears to passers by saying she was defending herself and the man gets the flak. Thats why I dont find thats why I dont find this video funny
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I have a friend who finally got out of an abusive relationship. He did everything to pleae her but it was not enough and she battered him on a daily basis. The only reason they split up is because HER parents walked in as she kicked him in the back and sent him flying down the stairs. When they asked why he didn't stick up for himself he said "I tried but every time I did she acted like the victim and everyone believed her because there is no way a girl would beat up a bloke" So no, either sex beating up someone of the opposite sex is funny but to think only women are the victims is beyond naive
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I once answered the door in a long brown robe and said "Oh, your not the ones who usually deliver the goat" and smiled as they apologised and quickly walked away
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Thats an old picture because pretty much everyone has dry wipe white boards so Im guessing that the poster saw it and thought they could pass it off as their own. Thats why I think the poster is trying to act like its theirs. Its very rare that something I learned a long time ago actually becomes relevant. We had to make small generators to light up a torch bulb. It was fun, mine was wind powered. as for the last sentence... Why should I? Its not like Spanish is a mainstream language in the UK. Anyway cheer up, its not like its your post...is it?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Thank you. I really appreciate you taking the time to explain that for me. Does this mean he would have gotten away with it if the grass box was full?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I'm lucky. When I feel like I need to boost my atheism there's always some bible bashing god bothering Jesus junkie knocking on my door in the rain proving to me that if there was a god he would have at least made it dry and sunny for the annoying little prick dripping on my door step, shivering and saying "Have you felt the love of our lord and saviour?" as I glance around thinking 'Yeah, you call that love? I call that an abusive relationship'
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Sorry, not British. His known on Youtube as ReSet but his real name is Kanghua Ren, and he’s a 20-year-old China-born Spaniard who lives in Barcelona.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I tip 35% on Sundays as I feel they should be home with their feet up and double in very bad weather. On hot days I order an extra can of soft drink and give them it when they arrive along with the tip
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Actually, I saw that bit and watching a dude walk out of a shop is not what I call a highlight. In this video the highlight was at the end when it stopped
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I read your comment too fast and thought he was going to inherit his parents house and scars. I thought 'Thats a bit harsh, go to hospital and get the same surgery as your parents... was there a 3 for 2 offer on?'
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Managed to work it out and its "I quit! You treat employees like dogs your not a good manager you told me to stop caring well here you are I dont care"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
It was Singapore and he did not marry her (who would blame him) https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4955738/Groom-takes-revenge-unfaithful-bride-cheat-video.html
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
That or the door that was fitted had a choice of solid panels or windows but some idiot at the warehouse packed the frame with a peep hole in it instead of the solid one.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
All spiders cannot grip onto a smooth surface (Which is why they end up stuck in a bath) To get to where that one is it would need to crawl around the smooth inside of the toilet roll holder which it cant do. Plus if you zoom in and look at the legs they are not in the natural position for a spider
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
They adjust for the average length of the cigarette. A pipe is longer also the sniper assumes the target is directly behind the smoke
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Neat! HA! those lines are a bloody mess! the board rubber is at least 2 feet from centre and you have got writing drifting into other parts of the diagrams and equations! Sloppy work indeed... never before has my anal retentiveness been so anally rententivated!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Not my post. I did electronics in college and remember this from when I did it 12 years ago and the information on that board up there... its in Spanish. I cant read Spanish. I just recognised the words Campo Girante from an example sheet from Spain about rotating magnetic fields. Not being pretentious and not being an asshole but also not trying to claim someone elses work as my own just for undeserved pats on the back
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Dana, try reading page 1. Your link is to a PDF from 2000 shortly before the way the WHO changed the way they ranked each country. The information I provide is total score from 2010 so not only is you data out of date but is now considered incorrect
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Ours are completely fucked up with that dumb shit Cummings driving about 250 miles to his family while he was sick and showing symptoms. Then what did he do? Drove even further for a day out at a castle to 'test his eyesight'. What a cunt! Ever since then no one has taken the lockdown seriously and are refusing to pay the fines because he suffered no consequences.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I used yahoo as it was quickest to get to it but the story is on the pretty much all the news networks here in the UK plus I have friends that live in the major coastal tourist centres and the general gist of it was "Fucking hell! The beaches are so crowded you can't see the sand!" But don't take my word for it. Here's the BBC https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-53190209 or maybe you would prefer The Telegraph, https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2020/06/25/like-armageddon-bournemouth-beach-crowds-spark-fears-uks-staycation/ but if that's not to your liking then what about The New York Post, https://nypost.com/2020/06/26/uk-beach-town-raises-alarm-as-huge-crowds-ignore-covid-advice-and-flock-to-the-coast/ I could go on with a lot of global news networks reporting on what has happened, and I am disgusted in this behaviour, I LIVE in the UK. It's dumb shit like this that fucks up our chances of an end to this lockdown and I hope every dumb fuck that does this gets it. Wankers!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
What the atheists are doing is responding. They don't walk around with signs looking for a religious gathering. They just get annoyed with 'Christians' carrying signs saying everyone who does not believe in a Christian god is going to burn in hell along with the gays. Sounds to me that they deserve it for instigating an atmosphere of hate. The only people who hate atheists for doing this are those very same types of Christians
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
The surgeon asks you to do tasks while they check the function of different parts of the brain. For example, they might ask you to speak. Or move part of your body, or check what you can feel. This is called function mapping. The surgeon can make sure that these functions are harmed as little as possible, if at all. In this case, she wanted to make sure she could still play the flute after the operation. For some one who cant do anything fancy it will be something like touching your thumb with each finger while spelling out 6 letter words.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Wow! Humour is lost on you. Try reading my original comment again and you will realise that it takes the piss out of the black idiots who think racism only happens to them and white people cant claim they were racially abused and the minute they get called out they will play the victim and use phrases like 'Black lives matter'. The rant you came out with is the biggest pile of bollocks ever.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Do you seriously think he is not going to do something so fucking stupid that the only action that the house of representatives is his impeachment? So far lady luck has kept him from actually going through with anything that would drop him in the shit but that kind of luck runs out very quickly. Hence kicked out for being a twat
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I used to loosen the connector for the next player. It was fun watching them click away like a mad gunman and not get a single shot off
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Oh the famous hand made roach card! Tearing off a strip and rolling it into a tube so you can enjoy the cigarette without wasting any tobacco at the end
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Actually, it's not bullshit. Our government are talking about shutting the beaches and other public places because of this. It pisses me off that so many people can be so fucking stupid. https://uk.news.yahoo.com/coronavirus-beaches-closed-social-distancing-070427158.html
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
No, they don't. A lot of Americans go to places such as Europe because the level of healthcare is the same and in some places better than America's and does not cost as much. You don't get rich by paying $100,000 to fix a broken arm when it costs nothing in Europe for the exact same treatment and when it comes to medication it costs nothing in the UK if you're disabled or unemployed its free but if you are working it would cost you £8.80 yet in America it would cost me $500 per week! and those are mostly generic brand. Certain medicines are not available in the US but their less effective versions are so I would also be buying inferior medication at extortionate prices and why would that be? Because the Pharmacy companies and the Insurance companies will happily fleece you at the cost of your health. It would be cheaper to die than get a broken arm fixed. Don't take my word for it though. Look on the internet but keep away from American sourced information as it is terribly biased
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Check your stats. You will find the WHO rated you quite poorly. http://thepatientfactor.com/canadian-health-care-information/world-health-organizations-ranking-of-the-worlds-health-systems/
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
America is top of the deaths leader board with 72,167 and the UK is 2nd with 29,498. America is not the land of the free because everything has a price and if something is given for free, then a cost can be arranged. For a fee of course.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
We dont measure our health care by how much you can afford and we dont measure our capability to pay by owning horses. The problem with America is they are brainwashed into thinking socialized is a dirty word born of communism when in reality it is purely a scam by american insurance companies to fleece everyone out of their money whilst not covering them for what they are paying for
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
I wont calm down as they are a lovely couple that we have all known for years. When they were more active they would sit and watch the kids for people when they had to nip to the shop. The old guy would drive people to the doctors or the local hospital and they have a great sense of humour and there is nothing funnier than an old couple taking the piss out of each other with big smiles. Then you see them struggling and it breaks your heart to see such lovely people get shafted by assholes hoarding basics. We have home delivery services for fuck sake! If your ill, order online and get your shopping delivered. But no, these hoarding pieces of crap have grabbed so much stuff that even the delivery guys have run out of stock because it had to go onto the shop floor. Sorry but it makes my blood boil!
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Tadaaaa! I'm glad I'm not even American! Seriously, take the time to examine in detail how much universal healthcare costs around the world and how much prescription drugs cost when you let the insurance companies and the hospitals and doctors control the costs. $30 for a plaster (band aid)! $500 to hold your own baby after giving birth! Next time you go to hospital ask for the bill and then when you have it ask for it again but itemised. When you get it you will either see how much you are being ripped off or the price will drop by a ridiculous amount. It would be cheaper to slap a $5 bill on a cut finger. The whole world know that and the whole world keep telling you that you are being ripped off but you won't listen. Why? Because universal healthcare is a communist plot and you shouldn't pay 50% of your wages for someone elses health care. In reality all it would take is an extremely small and unnoticeable cut to the military budget and putting it into healthcare. We pay 25% tax and 4% of that tax is put into healthcare. You won't pay any extra tax, the insurance companies become cheaper and more compliant because they are now options for preferential treatment instead of a mandatory requirement and hospitals will no longer be in charge of billing as they will have to ask the government for payment and not you and the pharmaceutical companies start dropping their prices because the cheapest supplier will get the healthcare contracts and they had better not cut the quality or they will get ripped to pieces in court for endangering the public just for a bit of extra cash and viola! You control the health industry because any countries leader that wants to stay in power had better look after it or the voter will vote for the other guy. It's that simple. Get the health care you pay for and deserve! We get the same level of healthcare as America and its does not cost us an arm and a leg! I know this will fall on deaf ears but can you really trust a president who wanted to buy the cure for covid-19 and keep it for America but charge the Americans with a 600% mark up and not let the rest of the world have it. In case your wondering the companies told Trump to fuck off and no one will deal with him. You will get you covid-19 vaccine with the rest of the world but you will be paying through the nose. Good luck.
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Yes. Thats my point. The minute he gets voted out the new president can withdraw the application. He has essentially shot himself in the foot for the next election. Thats assuming he does not get impeached first
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Quick thought for you, what would she do if a 6ft10inch muscular hairy hells angel walked up and said "Im a female Apache, gimme a cake bitch!"
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Nope. All Dana proved was that an American will deny what is fact and as I started : Already there are people on here spewing the propaganda they have been spoon fed since the day they were born. I'm expecting to see more Americans to appear and defend the very people ripping them off under the false belief that the world is suffering and America is winning the health lottery. Only an American will defend their healthcare system. The rest of the world either points and pities them for it or ridicules them for what they have. Your medications are the same as everywhere else in the world yet yours cost a hell of a lot more than anyone elses. Why is that? Why are you all paying so much more for the exact same thing as everyone else?
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Nope. Not smart either. Just seen so many of these that I have learnt to recognise them. A bit like watching enough Jump Scare videos will eventually make them ineffective
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
We pay a total of 25% in taxes. Approximately 3% to 4% of our yearly earnings go to the NHS. The rest is spread across a massive amount of areas such as defence, emergency services, public amenities etc. 20% is what the propaganda spinners tell you so that you wont vote for a national funded health service. Seriously, America needs to amend the constitution and make it more relevant to the present and not 200 years ago
TooMuchTimeOnMyHands
Paying out of your pocket when you require a one off prescription for something like antibiotics and are over 16 and in full time employment is £9. Part of our taxes support the entire system at £493 per year per employee earning £15k per year. Prescriptions for people who have diabetes, asthma, heart failure etc or under 16 don't pay. It's free at point of access but the whole country supports it because its better to heal potential workers to increase the work force that to let therm suffer and drain resources. It's not a perfect system but its a bloody good one that pretty much every country uses. Except for America. America puts money above all else and interestingly religion where they scream about atheists not having morals but refuse to listen to their morals when it comes to universal healthcare. Meanwhile in the UK the average atheist does not object to someone having free medication on the small amount taken out of his taxes each year
